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10:32 p.m. - 2021-02-17
Well I did it today..I called in sick just like I said I would. It never fails, everytime I'm on my period at work they totally load up my schedule back to back with passengers so I'm constantly chasing the clock. And then they've had me in that damn shuttle bus for the past 5 days and making me take it to all my least favorite and most difficult places to drop people. It wiped me out and pissed me off so bad. Eric got pissed off last week when a supervisor ran across the yard to catch up to him walking and talking on the phone alone just to tell him he needs to wear a mask even while alone! So he called in sick for 3 days and encouraged me to do the same.
I just refuse to be a martyr for job ever again! If a company pisses me off, or I'm too ill or in pain to work I'm calling in. I'm letting go of the days when I'd go in under any circumstance and work my ass off just to prove I can do it. I could never stand going to work and seeing the handful of sick people coughing and looking for sympathy because they have to go to work like that. The truth was they didn't have to but they choose to. I have a feeling those days are gone after this virus has brought in so much fear to even mention your feeling under the weather now.
So I arranged to fly and coach Sam today but the weather was down at 4:30am and told him we can meet at 11am after the fog burns off. I did my temp work then had him fly and pretend teach me. The pattern got so crazy busy that when a stupid Cirrus joined the pattern I told Sam that was the last straw, let's leave awhile. It was fun doing air work and I taught him new and real world ways of instructing basic maneuvers that make it a no brainer for people to understand. He's a good kid and it's nice to do some instructing and feel appreciated again.
Haven't heard from any of my friends, other then the ones from work lately. Maybe I should invite Rainbow over this weekend.. J is gone missing as well. She's been in a few of my dreams lately and I feel she's most likely doing some deep work on herself like many of us are.
I wrote to Rebecca about some early childhood dreams I had. The children trapped under the floor, the Mickey Mouse, clowns and spider woman trying to pull me under the sidewalk, along with the futuristic war one from when i was 7. It's so weird that I can remember these dreams so well, but hardly the ones I had last night!!! I'm glad I found Rebecca, I swear I know her some way..but I love the support and understanding she's given me.
Anyway, shoot it's late and I'm wide awake..



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