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9:33 p.m. - 2016-05-11
These Days
A day of going back and forth between lawyers..yuck! Sometimes I don't know which ones to believe.. Now my husband's atty wants to change the hearing date again. Mine said I'm no obligated to sign the paperwork for it, so I didn't. then she writes me some long letter saying how it be better to switch days for all these reasons I can't comprehend. So I just sent it to my atty.
My psychic said don't sign anything. She said it's better to wait and she'd rather I deal with mediation instead..but we'll discuss this next time we meet.
My son said to me today he wants to go to school in Morro Bay. I know he really wanted to move back east with me, he was so excited about it.
I'm raising my kids to be free spirits and to go out and explore the world, not just stay in one place. I'm glad he has that spirit.
I don't feel attached to any one place, though I do really miss Alaska. I prefer cold climates sick of this heat and dust. I'm pretty sure growing up around here has made me immune to Valley Fever.
Did not feel as anxious as I usually do today. That is a really good thing. Sometimes I don't know if it's me, or someone I'm close to as I'm a bit of an empath. Or sometimes it means the shit is about to hit the fan for some reason or another. My wires have been crossed lately so I'm really not sure anymore.
Today 2221 Huer Huer was outside and I delivered a package to him. His son is the head aircraft mechanic I tried to get a job with..but his company doesn't hire women mechanics or pilots. Anyway..he said he had been working since he was a little kid delivering milk, and now it's time to enjoy life. He thinks I work to much..I agree. I can't stand this one day off a week crap! I don't know how the lady I replaced did it for 16 years in a row! She must have gotten a lot out of it, a lot of rewards.
Aside from visiting all the animals and occasional nice person, it's pretty dull and monotonous delivering rural mail.
I think I spend too much time alone. At work and in general.
Though I really don't care to be around too many people lately. I will again though, after I work through all this and time passes.
So now I have a new old favorite theme song.. Can't think of anything more appropriate.

I've been out walking
I don't do too much talking
These days, these days
These days I seem to think a lot
About the things that I forgot to do
And all the times I had the chance to.

I've stopped my rambling
I don't do too much gambling
These days, these days
These days I seem to think about
How all the changes came about my ways
And I wonder if I'd see another highway

I had a lover
I don't think I'll risk another
These days, these days
And if I seem to be afraid
To live the life that I have made in song
It's just that I've been losing so long

I've stopped my dreaming
I won't do too much scheming
These days, these days
These days I sit on corner stones
And count the time in quarter tones to ten
Please don't confront me with my failures
I had not forgotten them

Nico - These Days



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